Thursday, January 21, 2010

The New Interpretation of the Early Bird gets the Worm

I have a love/hate relationships with cliches.

At first, I loved them. Just take a look at my grade five creative writing journals. Every story ends with one.

And then I didn't like them. They fell in the same category as air quotes and the constant over-use of "Excellent, Smithers!" while drumming my fingers together. I didn't particular like them but I kept using them as I communicated.

And now I find that I'm back to sorta liking them again. Although, today I've decided to modernize a few and re-invent a few to reflect my life.

Absence makes the heart grow fonder
New meaning:
10 minutes locked in my bathroom in silence makes me a better mom

All in due time
New meaning:
No, I said you need to wait for me to finish this before I get you a drink

Never pet a burning chicken
New meaning
Well, this is just sage advice. You don't mess with a classic.

One bird in hand is worth two in the bush
New meaning
It's easier to carry a duck than a tree full of blue jays

Slow and steady wins the race
New meaning
Someday the laundry will get done

Things aren't what they used to be
New meaning
Does anyone know where Mom's broom handle went to? Is that what's holding up your fort right now?

Chatty Cathy
New meaning
Please be quiet and don't interrupt, you're Dad and I are trying to talk.

Fork it over
New meaning
The cutlery is your job and there's no playing til it's done.

Full of himself
New meaning
Mom, 'Drew's diaper is full


How about you? Any cliches you can turn into Mom-isms?


3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'll have to think about this but I am laughing out loud!
HILARIOUS!

"full of himself!!!"

HA!

Camie said...

Early bird gets the worm

New meaning:

First one up gets the last bit of milk in their cereal

Time goes by too fast

New mean:

Hurry up we're going to be late!

lol - fun!

Amy said...

heehee..this is funny!!