The jig is almost up on this library racketeering ring I've got going on

So...I have this book that is overdue at the library.

It's been due since September.

Sigh.

At first, I had it. Then three weeks went by and *poof *suddenly it was due.

Then I couldn't locate it so I renewed it for another 3 weeks. That brought us to October.

Then I still couldn't find it. I renewed it for the 2nd and final time we are allowed to renew it. That took me to the first week of November.

Then something magical happened.

I was at the library picking up some books while on a break from my little Saturday job. The lady in front of me took waaaaay too long and my break was almost over by the time I got to the counter to take out my books.

I was explaining that I had to get going when the clerk--who I am well-known to since she sees me twice a week when I get out books--says "Give me your card and go! I'll take care of it."

"I think there are some overdue books."

"Don't worry. I'll override it."

Jackpot!

That brought me to December.

Then I renewed it again. That brought me to the middle of December.

Then I thought it was time to face the music and pay for the book that my house has eaten. I told the other librarian that I think I had misplaced it and that I should pay for it.

She shook her head. "I'll renew it one more time. Why don't you see what you can find at home."

That brings me to next week.

A week that is approaching rather quickly in my mind.

Especially since cupboards have been searched, bookcases moved, underwear drawers looked in (I am desperate. I know, who puts a book in their underwear drawer? I can't think straight when I'm desperate), and I even took a trip to the garage to see if I might have accidentally recycled it.

Nope.

Can't find it.

Can't find it all.

And the worst part is...

I've never even read it.