Thursday, July 1, 2010


Is it possible that 31 is the new 16?

I've always been a late bloomer.
I didn't get my license until I was nineteen.
My younger sister had a boyfriend before me.
We're not even going to discuss my cleavage development.

Remember 16?
The time of your life where you start to put together your dreams and figure things out and make embarrassing moments because you've rushed into things based on emotion rather than logic...or even prayer?

I think I may have skipped that whole season.

In fact, I'm pretty sure of it.

Most girls used curling irons then.
I bought my first one when I was 25.

Is it possible that you can experience "16"...some 16 years later?

Sometimes it feels like I'm just really beginning to discover who I am or how relationships really work.
Sometimes I over analyze everything to death and take myself way too seriously.
And sometimes I make a drama out of nothing, just like a 16 year old.

But I think I've matured a little in that area.
(Oh please, dear Lord, say 'yes, you have, my daughter')

Sometimes I feel like I'm just now putting on a dress that makes me look grown up. And I'm smiling shyly and feeling awkward but liking the advancement all at the same time.

Thank God I have the cleavage to hold the dress up this time around.
Experience I may be without, but time has rounded out a few things!

How is it possible that I've grown up when I still feel like a girl in so many ways?

I still eat my peanut butter out of jar with a spoon.
I still crank up the tunes, and lip sync to a song, looking in the rearview mirror and imagining I'm in my own music video.
I still get butterflies when he winks at me and fumble with my words when he's staring at me.

Maybe it's not so bad.

Discovering who I am, what I like and what I don't, realizing who God is to me and how I desire to live for Him.

That's what summer is like when you are sixteen.

At least it is this time around.

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