Have you ever started out one day feeling better than better and then shortly after you feel as though you are two miles past wrong? It's as though you made a flight plan from Seattle, WA to Toyko, Japan and when you were punching in all your numbers and settings for your plane to be set at, you punched in one degree of latitude less. At first, it doesn't seem like a big deal. You are only slightly off the mark. You are still heading in the same direction. Only shortly after, you suddenly find yourself having to make an emergency landing in the Yukon because you now see that one degree might have not made a big difference in the beginning, but it sure makes a big difference after 4 hours. And you realize that if you don't take this ememrgency landing now, that you may miss your last chance of getting where you are supposed to go and being able to land safely.
That's where I am today. I am at the emergency stop in Yukon. Not literally. Only figuratively.
It's almost like my life right now feels like a bag of socks. There are always those socks that needing matching and pairing after the laundry. And every once in a while you find a loose sock with no mate. So, you stick it in a sock bag and after a while you dump out the contents of the sock bag to see if the two lone socks have met up with each other. Sometimes they have and you're relieved that the dryer didn't eat them. And then sometimes you can't match the loose sock to anything...not after four consecutive times of being a member of the sock bag. And after awhile, you have about 5 or 7 socks that have no partner, no matching piece, and they no longer make sense in your life. The easy solution is to throw them out (or turn them into sock puppets for your two year old). But, the romantic, hopeful side of you says,"Wait, I'll just give these guys one more chance. Maybe, just maybe, on the next wash, the dryer will release it back into my hands."
But that never happens.
And time goes on and you have all these socks that just need to been thrown out. They are good for no purpose.
That's where I am today. Stuck with a bunch of pieces of my life that don't add up or make sense. And they aren't even really big issues or important matters. They are just all these tiny things that are taking up space, yet don't really matter. Yet, I'm still hesitant to throw them away. After all, they did serve a purpose once.
And so that's where I am today: in Yukon, on an emergency landing, with a bag full of mismatched socks.
I hope that makes sense.