Showing posts with label Ranting Diva. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Ranting Diva. Show all posts

Friday, October 1, 2010

Nursery Rhymes Make Me Question Life

I just realized today that when I play the itsy bitsy spider, it is an accurate spider.
Since thumbs are joined in the middle,
you have four fingers on each hand left over,
therefore eight "legs" in total.
I may have realized this before but it felt brand new today.

I find it really odd that "this little piggie ate roast beef". It disturbs me to think that pigs eat beef.

How big was the spider that frightened Miss Muffet away. I mean, knowing the size will determine whether I think she is a sissy or not.

Sunday, July 11, 2010

It's not just a song from Footloose--it actually applies to today

Guess what I did today?
I went on a date.
With my man.
Without our kids.
It bears repeating: Without our kids!!!!

And naturally we went to see a movie we've wanted to see for a while:
The Karate Kid.
Only, it should be called The Kung Fu Kid because, you know, that's what they learned: Kung Fu.
As in, not karate.
Semantics.

Here's what I hope happens as a result of this film.
I hope young men go and see it.
Then I hope the will put down their video gaming consoles and pursue a sport.
Any sport, really.
Just something that will teach them honor and respect and good ol' competition.
It wouldn't hurt to become a little more buff either.
Why?

Because there are a whole slew of young women in their 20's wishing that young men would get off their gaming butts and become men of honour.
Stop living in the fantasy world where you kick people's butt and are a conqueror, get involved in a sport and learn about pushing yourself beyond your limits!

Did you know that Nintendo's target audience is a 29-year-old North American male?
Yep.

Sad and true.

So, could Kung fu be the answer?
Well, Jesus is the answer always.
Men on their knees in prayer.
Men committed to truth in the face of opposition.
Men, who like King David said, "Is there not a cause?"

Aren't we all holding out for a hero?

Monday, May 10, 2010

I was wrong to have Reservations about No Reservations

Remember that rant a long time ago? way back in the day when two people read my blog--Aunt Rosie and my mom (click here)
The one where I was mad that they had taken my favourite film and turned it into an American version of cheese, cheese and more cheese.

Well, I watched it recently.
And I wanted to go one record saying, "I was wrong."
They didn't destroy the film. The original is still much better, but I would watch the new version again.


(What? I can admit when I'm wrong.)

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

3 Reasons You Need To Stop Following Me

This has been a lot of fun this Ultimate Blog Party.
It has.
I have found some really fun blogs (which I will post about later) and have met some new friends (yay! Shout out to BK: great comments!)

Ummm....my readership has gone up to 40 followers.
It doubled.
In 5 days.

And I'm kinda freaking out.
Here's why:
I comment back to everyone who follows me and to those who comment my posts. (If I haven't got to you yet, don't worry, I will).
I take my blog seriously in that I want to build friendships with people. I don't do "acquaintances". I develop relationships with people.

It's why I follow Brambleberry Grace and Jesus. Women. Words. These women impact me and I want to get to know them.

Now, I know how this whole party thing works. It's like swapping business cards. We exchange cards and hope that we contact each other in the future. And many times it's just dropped into a rolodex and only glimpsed at occasionally because it happens to be hidden behind the card for the Chinese Take-Out place that is used most often.

I don't want to become that kind of card...er, blog.
And neither do you, right? (maybe not. I could be wrong, it happened to me once before)

Here's the thing. I don't follow for the sake of following.
I have only immediately followed a handful of people and that is usually because I spent a while on their blog reading other posts.
I usually wait 4 weeks before following a blog--just to see if it's something I want to invest my time into. (And if you want to know how seriously I take my time, then please read my post: A guide to staying off your blog)

Maybe I'm having a hard time believing that so many want to read what I have to say, but I mean...truly...do you???


Now you are free to do as you choose but before you follow me, you might want to consider the following:

3 Reasons You Need to Stop Following Me

1. You don't really plan on reading me. You only hit follow 'cause you were in the party mood.
It's ok. You can remove yourself. We all do crazy things at a party some time and I have done some silly things myself.

2. You are hoping I will be reciprocal and follow and boost your numbers. Won't happen. Sorry 'bout that.

3. You collect blog friends, like you collect Facebook friends. I detest Facebook (read here) and I don't want to be remotely associated with those habits!

Well, there you have it. With the complete potential that I've insulted you and your competency.

I realize this is probably counter blog culture, but I guess the truth is...I want to journey with people, not just be another name on a list. I have always desired to be set apart.
So, please don't follow me unless you really mean to.
And I mean REALLY mean to.

It's ok to unsubscribe yourself. I haven't written down a list of names of who is following me and if I see your name disappear I won't be showing up to write mean comments on your blog.
Scouts honour.

This post feels a little bit like a mother walking in to announce that it's time to clean up the tea party and put the dolls away...but every party needs a pooper!

Consider yourself introduced to this party's pooper.

Thursday, March 18, 2010

A bee in my bonnet, and a crow in my craw

This post works best if we all imagine we are living in the late 1880's. A time when women would get together to sew quilt patches and exchange recipes. We're all sitting in a circle and the matronly gossipy old bitty says, "I keep everything. I don't get rid of anything."
The young, willowy just-come-of-age woman of the group says, "Oh, surely you don't mean that. You can't keep everything you've ever owned."
The ladies all exchange glances about the group.
"Oh, but I do. It seems to me that you might one day need something from one gadget or another."
"For shame," mutters the farmer's wife whose warm smile disappears as she says it.
"I beg your pardon?" says the old bitty looking over the edge of her glasses.
The farmer's wife puts down her sewing, squares her shoulders as she prepares to speak her mind. "I said, 'For shame.' "
Some of the ladies arch their eyebrows as others fidget with their needles.
"For heaven's sake, why do you think that?"
"Because you are not helping anybody but yourself by having all of that junk filling up your home."
A low murmur starts in the group, as the old bitty shifts in her chair, raising her chin with a challenge in her look.
"I wouldn't expect a farmer's wife to understand or to appreciate what is called valuable compared to," and she took a moment to give her a withering look as she pronounced the word, "junk."
A middle aged woman with greying hair clucked her tongue and sent a knowing look to the young mother who was knitting furiously as a result of the growing animosity.
The farmer's wife had dealt with stubborn bulls before and wasn't one to be moved by looks. She shrugged her shoulders and said, "Well, if it is truly valuable let the world know by holding it as a treasure in your home. And if it is not, then help someone else with it."
A few heads bobbed up and down in silent agreement.
The old bitty's jaw opened to speak and then closed, her mouth in a firm line. She finally settled back while muttering, "Well, I never..." and grumbling, "folks always needing charity..."
The group continued in silence for a while until the tea kettle whistled calling for a change in conversation.

Moral of the Story:
You don't need to keep your garage, basement and two extra closets filled with all that junk. Yes, I said it: Junk.
If it's really valuable, prove it. Display it, wear it, frame it, enjoy it. But don't hide it in an attic under three boxes and a wad of newspaper.
And the rest of the stuff: give it away. Stop being so selfish and holding onto this stuff.
How many immigrants coming to Canada could use your old dresser that is holding papers from 1986 and the clothes you promised you would fit into again?
How many young couples start out with nothing and could use your old coffee table that you are saving for that summer sunny day when you finally getting around to the well-intended DIY project?
How many not-for-profit organizations, new ministries or care groups need some furniture to just to get things going?
And all those old clothes that have been in your closets since the 90's--get rid of them!
You aren't ever going to use them.

If there is one thing I learned from my grandmother's death (and I learned a lot but this is one is a gem). No child loves to spend four weeks going through old newspapers that can't be donated to museums. Nobody loves to spend hours packing up the myriad of grocery bags you just had to keep because who knows when a food shortage could happen.
I love you Grandma, but for heaven's sakes, nobody needed the box of rusty nails you hung onto.

Hello people, we live in North America. Every Salvation Army has a shirt you can buy for 2 bucks to be your much needed painting shirt. Throw the 90's clothing away.

So...here and now. This is my position on hoarding and holding onto everything you own because one day you might need it:
Stop being selfish.

What? Did that get your knickers in a knot?

Thursday, January 14, 2010

What do you think: Grape or Cherry?

Do you ever feel like a sucker?

Today, I do.

Someone emailed me. She doesn't usually email me unless she wants information to pass off to others in a way that makes her look like she's good friends with me. She's done this a few times. It's because of a mutual friend we have and for some reason she has this competitiveness that says, "I know her better than you" attitude she displays to the other friend.

Nah-nah-nah-nah-nah.

I got an email from her.
Out of the blue, like usual. I debated writing her back. I wondered what her real motive was. And then I thought, 'you know what, I'm not going to be petty and not email her back. I will tell her about cleaning my closet and painting my walls.' (Yes, I know. That's a deep friendship when you can talk so openly about mundane everyday life things-ha!)

And she responded today...telling me that our friend is coming to visit here in a few weeks.

I felt really stupid. Once again I played into her warped childish game. The sad thing is I don't even think she is aware that she does this.

I think there is something in the water in Wisconsin.

Dear Lord,
I pray for those who use me.
I pray You would bless her. Cause Your glory to shine on her. Let Your deep, rich love reach the spot of sadness inside of her that feels compelled to make herself look better by being a person who knows more or thinks they know more about others. Fill her loneliness Lord Jesus. Remind her that Your blood was enough. That she is accepted--your nail scarred hands say as much. Free her from any trace of self-hatred and shame that she carries with her.
God, let her hear the song You sing over her. Let her be awakened by the sweetness of Your Spirit and help her to stop believing the lie that says 'she's only good enough if she does this or that.' Set her free, God. Break the power of shame in her life.
Let the only thing that is worth talking about to others be Jesus Christ and His radical love for her.
I trust You, God.

In Jesus Name, Amen.

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

A guide to staying off your blog...

...and having a life!
I am not on the internet very much, and yet I have a blog--isn't that a paradox? No, no it's not. But let me tell you the tricks that I use to get lots done on the net and still have a life-maybe some will work for you.

1. Ditch the H1FacebookN1 virus- I think I've made it clear that I dislike Face*book. I know that for some this is a great tool for you, blah, blah,blah.
Here's my beef with FB, I actually think it lulls people into a false sense of relationship with one another. If you want a real friendship with someone, have them over to your house. (yeah, yeah I know...what if they live in Africa? Get a calling card.)
Real relationship is built up over time spent together, memories made and conflicts being resolved. (I also think that conflict is the catalyst for deeper relationship if handled properly, but that's a post for another day). Ditch Facebook if you are on it more than once a day and redeem the time!

2. Put a Time Limit On It- I love being a wife and mom. It's where I want to focus the majority of my time. But I'm easily distracted. (Anybody remember the time where all I did was post what I saw on youtube???!?!) So, time limit's work well for me. I have an hour and a half a day to do my computer stuff. And it's between the hours of 5 am and 7 pm. Once it's 7 pm, I am done with the internet world and on to more important things like hanging out with my husband.

3. Work the Time Limit- Here's the power of pressure. I know I only have an hour and a half and it forces me to be efficient. Often times, I am done all my blog, homeschool searching, emails, etc. within 45-50 minutes. Frees me up to make water xylophones with my kids orbake smooshed cookies.

4. Priorities, Priorities, Priorities-My family is my priority. Making my home a safe haven for memory-making, mistakes and laughter is extremely important to me. Instilling the values and the truth of Jesus is priority numero uno. When answering emails, looking at blogs, I ask myself, "How does this contribute to my family's goals? Does this build me up spiritually? Could I be having fun with my kids right now instead of reading up on macrame?" Knowing my priorities let's me be selective and productive on the internet.

5. Splurge-Internet killed the video star. People can spend hours on the internet in total amusement and caught up in eye candy, the same way people were glued to the TV tube a generation ago. Sometimes it's ok to splurge and take an evening and get caught up on blogs, and surf around and look for random things that you type into google just to be goofy. Every once in a while I get on the net for a few hours and let loose. But don't make it a lifestyle. Make it a splurge! A random occurence! Something you do now and then! Someth--you get the picture.

There you have it! This is what I do to make the most of my time on the internet and still have a life.
What do you do?

Friday, May 8, 2009

Why I detest faxing...

Seriously? Does there need to be a reason?
As we speak I am faxing off the same document 13 times to 13 businesses. I wish I had an employee to pay to do all of this!
How I wish that everyone wanted email copy of things.
Rant over.

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Finally, Yahoo news can get on with life!

I am so grateful that the US Democratic Party has finally chosen their leader.
 Why?
Because finally, maybe the news can get on with pointing out some actual news.
 I can't even say how bored I have become by the whole thing. For months we've seen blazing photos of both Hillary and Barak. This thing has dragged out longer then Victor Newman's return from the dead on the Young and the Restless .
What I would really love to see is the US just try and do campaigning Canuck style. Canadians have 58 days--that's it!--58 days of campaigning. For less than two months we hear talk and promises, we hear flaws pointed out and we get to hear a good little rant by CBC funny man journalist Rick Mercer. But that's it.
We vote. We got on with business.
How grateful I am that this is over? Very, very grateful.
But now...the long and never ending story part deux happens as the campaigning for President starts. Oh, that I had a US political news filter on my computer.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Friday, March 14, 2008

A little squabble with my bro

I thought everyone might get a laugh from the emails between my brother and me about our iMac/PC faceoff. Hehe

Hey Hols,
oh and nice touch about the new imac, let us commoners(pc owners) grovel at the table of thy liege(mac users) in hopes that the crumbs of your excellency may rain down upon us, and we might taste the sweet necter of mac.
jeff

Hey Jess,
I would but love to let you have the crumbs of my excellency, but alas, the imac is too efficient to let but one morsel fall to the floor. I doth fear that ye must return to the days of sniffing the dirt. (To which, Dusty from the movie Twister, responds "better than what you sniff.")
Hols
ps btw, nectar is spelled with an 'a'. iMac has instant spell check...oh, I forgot, you don't have one...maybe you can buy an old paperback dictionary!

Hols,
I have had enough of all you imac backpack high society talk. I will use my paperback dictionary and when I do I won't find imac in there or ipod, iphone but I will find injustice! because that's exactlly what this is." (In the words of Bill from the film Twister) "Dorothy- you stole her you damn thief"(said with the wiggle of my chin). You see, Holly, imac is like the new car on the lot sure she might turn some heads, it might even soothe the itch of the compulsive buyer( I shouldn't ....but I just can't resist). At the end of the day it's just another car that you probably spent too much on. I see myself as a practicle man. The p.c., Hols, is like a great american classic. Everyone know she exsists. Sure, she might break down along the way from point a to b. But there is one thing that seperates the two of us. At the end of the day I have a story of how I had to perservere, that even though things didn't go my way I still got there. Who wants to listen to you ramble on about how 'my mac has never crashed blah blah blah'. Where's the excietment, where's the sense of adventure? If you want to tuck that imac security blanket around go right ahead.
I am fine out here on a limb with my p.c. I will still be here running true, on the edge.
jeff

Hey Jess,
You spelled practical wrong. Is there room for your paperback dictionary out on that limb? Hang tight, little bro. Hang tight.
Hols

Friday, May 4, 2007

No reservations...oh I have them!



My favourite movie is Mostly Martha (Bella Martha as it's original foreign title is)--it is a foreign film. What I love about foreign films is that they are very un-Hollywood in their storytelling. This particular movie is so simply done with understatement and excellent acting not to mention a great soundtrack. I love the comedy and the romance in this film and how it all unfolds. It is very realistic in a "sometimes life just happens that way" kind of way and it doesn't have this huge philosophical conclusion. Love this film.

Now Hollywood is coming out with it's version called "No Reservations" with Catherine Zeta-Jones and Aaron Eckhart. sigh. I watched the trailer and was immediately saddened--the scenes of CZJ playing Martha showed a tough, control freak trying to figure out why her life is not the way she planned. This is a total misinterpretation of Martha from the German film. Yes, she was a control freak but it wasn't portrayed like this tough "i'm in control woman", instead she wore it like a coat of vulnerability not even aware that it was a problem holding her back. And Aaron Eckhart is no Sergio Castellitto--he just does not hold the same comedic appeal.

Bella Martha should be watched just for the food that is made on that movie. So delicious.

Anyway, that's my rant.

Grrrr Hollywood. Must everything be so happy and pretty all the time? Don't you know that sometimes a story is just a story with no ending that starts in the middle--why must you mess with poetic filmmaking?